Like Teaching an Infant Algebra
another night where the first
jack and coke quickly becomes
your fourth
where the overs aren’t hitting
and the unders aren’t either
explaining a parlay to your date
is like teaching an infant algebra
your patience runs as thin
as her tolerance for alcohol
eventually, you’re smart enough
to change the subject completely
compliment her looks
crack a joke, make her smile
fuck, i needed that three
to go down
any chance of this night going
well will only happen if we get
the fuck out of here
check please
no, i’ll take care of the tip
just wait until your sexy ass
gets in the car
Natural Causes
you ever wonder about death
about what will be said when
you are found prone, lifeless
who knows where the gun
will be
or is it just me
natural causes doesn’t have
that sexy ring to it like suicide
or dancing with a train
of course, there is the asshole
on my other shoulder
the one more geared toward
logic, practical thought
he tends to believe my death
will be mundane
in bed
probably with a belt around
my neck trying to reach climax
it is always those straightlaced
fuckers that have the most
perverse thoughts resting
under that comfortable
sweater
the brain i use most often
never thinks about death
he would simply like it if something
other than my hand would slide
down there from time to time
A Night of Doing Strange Drugs
she had the taste of dr. pepper
with a hint of a clove cigarette
i was in one of my underground
music phases
she, for some reason, thought
i was cool
i would prove her wrong
soon enough
but this was a night of doing
strange drugs
making out on a shitty couch
taking her home and her laughing
when i asked if i could come in
i thought maybe she was flirting
apparently, sleep was more
important
but still wired, i drove the night
looking for a hooker to break
me in two
no luck
a drawback of the small cities
of the midwest
she forgot i slipped her panties
off while on the couch
they helped me make it through
the night
Bio: J.J. Campbell (1976 - ?) was raised by wolves yet managed to graduate high school with honors. He's been widely published over the years, most recently at The Beatnik Cowboy, Synchronized Chaos, The Rye Whiskey Review, Horror Sleaze Trash and Misfit Magazine. You can find him most days on his mildly entertaining blog, evil delights.https://evildelights.blogspot.com
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